Although I know that I made the right decision to stay at
home and be with my baby, there are times when I look at my
working friends and feel regret. They wear nice clothes and
get adult conversation. They make decisions daily that do
not concern rice cereal and red rashes. I don’t mean
to be flippant about this, but how do I know that I did the
right thing and that the financial sacrifice is worth it?
Whatever decision you made would have entailed some sacrifice.
It’s the nature of the situation. So while you may
envy your working friends, whether they admit it or not,
there are time when they envy you. When not having to dress
up, not be in a rush and trying to make correct decisions
in a work enviroment when they are blurry from exhaustion
after a night with a sick child, when just being at home
with the baby seems like the best thing they can think of.
So remind yourself constantly that there is neither an
easy nor a correct decision in this regard. Perhaps what
you could look at is finding a compromise situation. There
has never been a better time to be a mother with flexible
options. There are job share options, work from home options
and other interesting opportunities that will help you retain
your individuality while still being present for your baby.
You seem to feel that you made the right decision. Looking
at your life with a fresh eye and finding creative outlets
for your talents that can also bring in some money may be
the way to solve the envy you feel. However, if you did
not feel that you had made the right decision, these decisions
are not cast in stone. Women who return to work can resign
and become stay at home moms. Once your baby becomes a sociable
toddler, you may feel completely happy to leave your child
at a crèche while you go back to work. Be flexible.
Reassess the situation regularly and remind yourself that
babies are so adaptable. All they need is love and security,
and they will accept most of the changes that you ask them
to. The right decision for the whole family includes one
that makes you feel fulfilled.
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